Mothers and fathers, friends and family, sisters and brothers, grandparents and relatives of all sorts, I give to you a warm greeting from Boy Scout Troop 820 and Highway I-75. Allow me to introduce myself as Louie Hehman, the senior scout of this trip and your humble scribe, the recorder of events and relater of occurrences as seen through my eyes. This year, the young men (and, in several cases, the not-so-young men) of Troop 820 are setting our sights eastward as we head toward that lovely gem of a state that is West Virginia. So, we’re looking eastward to a state with the word “west” in its name, and yet for some reason we are heading south on I-75… What a fascinating trip this has turned out to be within its first few hours!
As we continue driving southward despite my insistence that West Virginia is most assuredly not found south of Kentucky, I find myself quite amused at the veritable potpourri of weird and wonderful people who I am honored to join on this grand excursion. To my left in the driver’s seat is my own father, the great and wise Luke Hehman. Standing at six foot three and covered in a mane of bushy blonde hair, Luke is a true beast of a man, sporting a striking pair of sideburns and seventeen years old as of yesterday… wait… no, that’s me… In actuality, Luke is quite a bit older than that but still going well for a fellow of his respectable age. In his defense, older men have certainly done less; he’s been around the block more than a few times… and yet he is still driving south when West Virginia is east of us. Behind me sits Jacob Z, a sporting young lad in his low teens. Jake is the biggest KISS fanatic in the state of Kentucky, although he insists to the contrary. Jake has been a member of Troop 820 for two years. He is a veteran of last year’s trip to Wyoming, and now is quite excited to test in West Virginia the skills he mastered out west. Jake is a Second Class Scout (“very, VERY close to first” he says before reciting the Preamble to the Constitution). Next to Jake sits my own brother, First-Class Scout Hank. Hank has been in Troop 820 for four years, and is proud to be going on his fourth trip (the first three being Canada, Land Between the Lakes, and Wyoming). Hank’s favorite word is “cheese” and while in Land Between the Lakes, he was able to earn the nickname “Guppy” from the Eagle Scouts. Behind Hank is young Master William, who joined the troop at about the same time as Jake. Rather than being fairly excitable as Jake is, he prefers the term “straight-up pumped.” Will also attended the Wyoming trip and is ready to make his name as a seasoned Second-Class Scout (“I’m almost first, too” says Will as he pops in his earphones).
These are the current riders in my car, but there is another carful of equally intriguing characters driving in the car riding just behind our own. Or at least they were twenty minutes ago. Anyway, riding in the other car is the world-renowned dentist Dr. Michael C. Dr. C has been involved in the troop probably since before many of you were born. His eldest son earned his Eagle Scout several years ago and Dr. C was involved ever since his firstborn was a lowly Tenderfoot. Dr. C is one of three people going on this trip who were fortunate enough to attend the famous Alaska trip five years ago (the others being myself and my father). Prior to that, he had been to the Black Hills and several other major trips with Troop 820; hence, he is the most experienced member of our merry band. Sitting shotgun in Dr. C’s car is Jake’s father, Mr. Z. Mr. Z is generally happy fellow who has been involved in the troop since his son’s joining. Mr. Z is a true Theodore Roosevelt of a gentleman, a born leader and outdoorsman who “speaks softly, but carries a big stick.” The authorities have been alerted to his presence amongst our company, as evidenced in Wyoming when he was frisked by local police due to his abundance of pockets. In summary, he is a hardened criminal with pocketfuls of used gum-wrappers. He is revered by his cell-mates as “Gummy.” The other rider in Dr. C’s car is the doctor’s own son, Colin. Colin joined the troop at the same time as Will and Jake, and is known as the designated “cool kid” of the trip. Colin will also serve as our Senior Patrol Leader on this trip. Other Scouts will be joining us later in the week, i.e. Will’s father, a.k.a. “Big Daddy Sackful” courtesy of the Scouts who went on last year’s Wyoming trip. Around the same time as Big Daddy (who is the usual webmaster for this blog) arrives, Mr. Richard R and his son Luke will also join us, along with Hunter. Luke and Hunter are both newly-joined Scouts and are certainly excited for their first summer trip. More in-depth coverings of their characters will be given later, but for now I think I’ve rambled on enough. I should be going anyway. I’ve got to convince my dad that West Virginia won’t be found off of I-75. KEEP IT REAL.
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